Tuesday, June 2, 2015

Case Study No. 1996: Agnus of Planet Whisper

Let's Play "Brad Stallion 4" Part 1: Galactic Library
1:12
From the Internet Archive:
https://arc hive.org/details/ msdos_Sex_Olympics_1990
Tags: Brad Stallion MSDOS librarian
Added: 4 months ago
From: ToonLib
Views: 2

[scene opens in a hotel room, with clothes thrown messily on the bed]
NARRATOR: You are in a gaudy looking hotel room.
[the player clicks on the picture of the woman in the inventory (representing the ship's on-board computer)]
SANDY: Hi! I'm Sandy. I'll help you as much as I can ...
[the player clicks on the clothes on the bed]
NARRATOR: What would you like to do with the clothes?
[the player clicks "Take"]
NARRATOR: You take the clothes.
[the player clicks on the clothes in the inventory]
NARRATOR: What do you want to do with the clothes?
[the player clicks "Use"]
NARRATOR: You quickly get dressed.
[the player clicks on the card on the dresser next to the bed]
NARRATOR: What do you want to do with the ID_card?
[the player clicks "Take"]
NARRATOR: You take the ID and put it in your pocket.
[the player clicks "Go"]
NARRATOR: Go where?
[the player clicks on the doorknob]
NARRATOR: Okay.
[cut to an exterior shot of the hotel, where a giant phallus-shaped spaceship is parked next to a large gas tank]
NARRATOR: Outside your hotel room, you can see Big Thruster in the distance. The air smells fresh and clean.
[the player clicks on the gas tank]
NARRATOR: What about the gas tank?
[the player clicks "Look"]
NARRATOR: You look inside the tank. Smells like rocket fuel. More than enough to fill Big Thruster, hint hint.
[the player clicks "Use"]
NARRATOR: Use what?
[the player clicks the gas tank]
NARRATOR: You fill the Big Thruster with Gas, preparing for another journey and another conquest.
[the player clicks "Go"]
NARRATOR: Go where?
[the player clicks the spaceship]
NARRATOR: Okay.
[cut to a screen showing several planets]
NARRATOR: You are seated in the Captains Chair at the controls of Big Thruster. The Interactive View Screen is before you.
[the player clicks on the small diamond-shaped planet on the screen]
NARRATOR: This is the planet Whisper.
[the player clicks "Go"]
NARRATOR: Your Big Thruster swells and blasts off towards Whisper. With a Thruster as big as this, you arrive in no time at all.
[the player clicks "Unzip", then cut to the surface of the planet Whisper, featuring a giant building in the distance (with a sign reading "Galatic Library")]
[the player clicks "Information"]
NARRATOR: You are outside the Galactic Library.
[the player clicks "Look"]
NARRATOR: There is nothing special to look at here ...
[the player clicks "Go"]
NARRATOR: Go where?
[the player clicks the library]
NARRATOR: Okay.
[cut to inside the library, where a young female librarian (red hair in a bun, glasses, conservative blouse) is sitting at the front desk and staring sternly at the camera]
NARRATOR: You are inside the library. The librarian (her name tag says Agnus) looks at you and asks for your identification.
[the player clicks "Look"]
NARRATOR: Look where?
[the player clicks on the librarian's face]
AGNUS: Quit staring, young man! And show me your ID card.
[the player clicks "Look"]
NARRATOR: Look where?
[the player clicks on the librarian's chest, then "Slap!" appears on screen]
NARRATOR: Agnus slaps your face for staring!
[the player clicks "Touch"]
NARRATOR: Touch what?
[the player clicks on the librarian's face, then "Slap!" appears on screen]
AGNUS: Leave me alone! Your card, please.
[the player clicks "Talk"]
NARRATOR: Talk to what?
[the player clicks on the librarian's face]
NARRATOR: You can not talk to that.
[the player clicks "Kiss"]
NARRATOR: Kiss what?
[the player clicks on the librarian's face]
AGNUS: Just your ID please.
[the player clicks "Look"]
NARRATOR: Look where?
[the player clicks on the ID card in the inventory]
NARRATOR: This is an identity card. The photo looks a lot like Brad Stallion.
[the player clicks "Give"]
NARRATOR: Give what?
[the player clicks on the ID card in the inventory]
NARRATOR: You give your card to the librarian, Agnus, who examines it closely. "Yes, this is valid," she says, "Now what do you want?"
[the player clicks "Look"]
NARRATOR: Look where?
[the player clicks on a book on the desk]
NARRATOR: The book is closed, but its title reads "Olympic Trivia."
[the player clicks "Take"]
NARRATOR: Take what?
[the player clicks on the book]
NARRATOR: "You can't take that," scolds Agnus.
[the player clicks "Take"]
NARRATOR: Take what?
[the player clicks the ID card (which is floating in front of the librarian)]
NARRATOR: You take the ID and put it in your pocket.
[the player clicks "Exit"]
NARRATOR: You go outside.
[cut back to the outside of the library]
NARRATOR: You are outside the Galactic Library.
[the player clicks "Talk"]
NARRATOR: Talk to what?
[the player clicks the picture of Sandy]
SANDY: I wonder if they remember the books you never returned, ten years ago.
[the player clicks "Go"]
NARRATOR: Go where?
[the player clicks on the spaceship]
NARRATOR: Okay.
[cut back to the view screen inside the spaceship]
NARRATOR: You are seated in the Captains Chair at the controls of Big Thruster. The Interactive View Screen is before you.
[the player clicks on the large blue planet on the screen]
NARRATOR: This is the planet Agua.
[the player clicks "Go"]
NARRATOR: Your Big Thruster swells and blasts off towards Agua. With a Thruster as big as this, you arrive in no time at all.
[the player clicks "Unzip", then cut to the surface of the planet Agua (where a pair of red glasses is sitting on the beach next to the spaceship)]
NARRATOR: What about the glasses?
[the player clicks "Take"]
NARRATOR: You take the glasses.
[the player clicks the glasses in the inventory]
NARRATOR: What do you want to do with the glasses, Brad?
[the player clicks "Look"]
NARRATOR: It's just a pair of glasses.
[the player clicks "Go"]
NARRATOR: Go where?
[the player clicks on the spaceship]
NARRATOR: Okay.
[cut back to the view screen inside the spaceship]
NARRATOR: You are seated in the Captains Chair at the controls of Big Thruster. The Interactive View Screen is before you.
[the player clicks on Whisper]
NARRATOR: This is the planet Whisper.
[the player clicks "Go"]
NARRATOR: Your Big Thruster swells and blasts off towards Whisper. With a Thruster as big as this, you arrive in no time at all.
[the player clicks "Unzip", then cut back to the surface of Whisper]
[the player clicks "Go"]
NARRATOR: Go where?
[the player clicks the library]
NARRATOR: Okay.
[cut back to inside the library]
NARRATOR: You are inside the library. The librarian (her name tag says Agnus) looks at you and asks for your identification.
[the player clicks "Use"]
NARRATOR: Use what?
[the player clicks the glasses in the inventory]
NARRATOR: You put on the glasses.
[the player clicks "Kiss"]
NARRATOR: Kiss what?
[the player clicks on the librarian's face, as "Smooch" appears on screen]
NARRATOR: Agnus stares at you in amazement.
AGNUS: You are just what I have been looking for! It has been so long that I can't remember how long it has been.
[cut to a new picture of the librarian (without her glasses) smiling, as her blouse is open to reveal her breasts]
NARRATOR: Agnus rips off her blouse, and says "You, I like!"
[the player clicks "Look"]
NARRATOR: Look where?
[the player clicks on the librarian's chest]
NARRATOR: Did you know that it was possible for eyeballs to fog up?
[the player clicks "Kiss"]
NARRATOR: Kiss what?
[the player clicks on the librarian's chest]
AGNUS: Ooohhh yes, that feels so good!
[the player clicks "Touch"]
NARRATOR: Touch what?
[the player clicks on the librarian's chest]
NARRATOR: You touch them, and they bobble ...
[the player clicks "Touch"]
NARRATOR: Touch what?
[the player clicks on the librarian's chest]
NARRATOR: What about the other things I offer?
[the player clicks "Talk"]
NARRATOR: Talk to what?
[the player clicks on the librarian's chest]
NARRATOR: If you want to talk, my ears are up here!
[the player clicks "Drop"]
NARRATOR: Drop what?
[the player clicks on the clothes in the inventory]
NARRATOR: Where?
[the player clicks on the desk, as the clothes appear in front of the librarian]
NARRATOR: You remove your clothes.
[the player clicks "Screw"]
NARRATOR: Screw what?
[the player clicks on the librarian, as "Oh Brad!" appears on screen]
NARRATOR: You make love to Agnus. Once aroused, she is more of a tiger than a pussycat. In a moment of weakness, she confesses that your quest is known to her. She also reminds you that although Doctor Dildo is sly and fast, he can be beaten. I have heard that for each and every girl, there is a way to ensure that the Doctor will never be able with her!
[cut to the librarian (now fully nude and with her hair pulled out of its bun) leaning seductively against the desk, as "Results so far ... The score is tied! Brad has 1, Dr. Dildo has 1" appears on screen]
NARRATOR: There are books all over the place. Agnus leans against the desk, admiring your naked body.
[the player clicks "Talk"]
NARRATOR: Talk to what?
[the player clicks on the librarian's chest]
NARRATOR: It's like they aren't even listening.
[the player clicks "Talk"]
NARRATOR: Talk to what?
[the player clicks on the librarian's face]
AGNUS: That was terrific, Brad. By the way, Doctor Dildo has a daughter.
[the player clicks on the librarian]
NARRATOR: What about Agnus?
[the player clicks on "Touch", as "Giggle" appears on screen]
NARRATOR: Agnus giggles and begs for more!
[the player clicks on the librarian]
NARRATOR: What about Agnus?
[the player clicks on "Touch", as "Giggle" appears on screen]
NARRATOR: Agnus giggles and begs for more!
[the player clicks on the book (now open) sitting on the desk]
NARRATOR: What about the book?
[the player clicks on "Look"]
NARRATOR: Written on an open page is "Ewe will find me in the South-West pasture."

---

From about.com:

From 1988 to 1998 independent developers Free Spirit Software took a crack at making their own sexy humor adventure game franchise in an effort to hit the same demographic as Sierra's sexy-comedy franchise, Leisure Suit Larry. Their attempt ended up as Brad Stallion, confident, ripped, well-hung porn star of the future, who went on to star in four different graphical adventure games.

In his final game, Sex Olympics, Brad must compete in the intergalactic Olympic games against his arch nemesis, Dr. Dildo. What makes these Olympic games so unique is that instead of judging the winner based on skill, talent, and form, the futuristic Olympics is simply a race to see who can bone the most intergalactic babes, and while Brad represents Earth, his only competitor, Dr. Dildo, doesn't represent any planet.

Basic Facts:

* Title: Sex Olympics (aka Brad Stallion: Sex Olympics)
* Publisher/Developer: Free Spirit Software
* Release Date: 1990 (PC), 1991 (Amiga)
* Platform: PC-DOS, Amiga
* Genre: Graphical Adventure-Game: Point-and-click.

Let the Sex Games Begin

The game opens with Brad looking upon his grungy hotel room on earth when a letter appears on the floor. It reads...

"Dear Brad: Once again, we at Earth Central need your help. As you know, we are sponsoring our annual Sex Olympics competition. Normally, we wouldn't expect the famous Brad Stallion to participate, just to be fair to the other players, but this year something unexpected has happened: Dr. Dildo will be competing. We need someone of your caliber to represent Earth. It would not be good for someone like the infamous D. Dildo to win this prestigious event. We shall keep you and the world informed via Galactic Broadcasts...Do not fail us! Go quickly, the games have begun!"

This kick starts the point-and-click graphical adventure game where Brad gasses up his Big Thruster and planet hops across the galaxy solving puzzles and hunting out 10 (or as close to 10) woman to screw before Dr. Dildo beats him to the...well...punch just doesn't seem like the right term here.

The Key To a Woman's...uh...Heart?:

To hunt out these women, plus find the right objects, tools and mementos, Brad must planet hop, and occasionally refuel. Along the way he needs to find the right gifts, disguises and charms, to open the minds...and legs, of the young alien ladies in helping put a new notch on Brad's bedpost, and/or to slow down Dildos progress.

Not all of the planets hide women; some simply contain objects that you need to find for your journey, such as Ramewe, which contains the Queen Sheep who you have to coax into giving you her crown. Now that's not to say you can't still have 'relations' with the Queen Sheep, but it'll leave a stink on you that will repel any other woman you come across.

The items that you come across throughout the various planets help you on your journey, or can be used to cock-block Dr. Dildo's progress. Sometimes it's as simple as being the first to lay the lady, other times it's finding and hording Dildo's batteries, or coming up with a disguise, like glasses or a fake ID, or tools of the sex trade such as Clothing Disintegration Gun and the Thermo Schlong Warmer, or even a stun gun (don't worry, the stun gun isn't used for sex, but to get past guards.)

Each time you play the objects are hidden in different locations, requiring you to search out planets and screw the women in different orders each time, making the experience one big puzzle game.

The Women and Their Orbs...er...I mean "Planets":

* Planet Arboria - Trees, trees, nothing but trees, but some have apples on them. I wonder if they will come in handy?

* Inge / Planet Floe - On the ice planet Floe you'll find yourself a warm spot in the Inge, the problem is making it without freezing your nuts of...literally.

* Crystal / Planet Mediol - This sleeping beauty wont give up her treasure unless she thinks your from royalty.

* Sirena / Planet Agua - A mermaid who gives new meaning to the term gone fishing. The only question I have is, how does Brad manage when she's got a fin instead of a...well...she's got a fin for goodness sakes. How does that mechanically work?

* Grizelda / Planet Primordial - Behind a vicious dog lays the humble hut of horny hag, but if you eat some fruit, this crab apple will turn into a sweet tart.

* Pricilla / Planet Beach - This sand dune smashing, sports car sensation suffers from only one handicap - she can't seem to figure out how to take off her clothes. Luckily there is a Clothing Disintegration Gun that will help rid her of those pesky threads.

* Mamonga / Planet Cleft - This girl plays hard to get, which leads to an incredibly annoying and tedious portion of the gameplay. This mainly because she's hide-and-seeking in a pitch-black cave. Not only the most annoying gameplay in the adventure, but if your not careful, once you've had your way, she'll playfully swipe your cloths and disappear once again into the darkness, wasting valuable mating time as you feel your way around in the darkness.

* Ayesha / Planet Hivernia - The queen bee of Hivernia is board out of her gourd, and ready for action, but if she finds that you've shagged any of the isles of identical ditzy drones, she'll permanently shun you.

* Agnus / Planet Whisper - Literally the sexy librarian and a big fan of Brad's "work". Not only does she help check out your stack, but gives you a tip to trip up Dr. Dildo.

* Queen Sheep / Ramewe - If you keep circling this flock of sheep, you'll eventually find Queen Sheep. You've gotta charm her crown off to complete your quest, but you don't have to feast on this leg of lamb unless the mood strikes you. A word of warning, if you get dirty with this ovis, you'll need a bath real fast.

* Lotta Luv / Planet Earth - It's Brad's Girlfriend who he left handcuffed and then forgot about her. Sure she was in the hotel room next to him the whole time, but locked the door and lost the key somewhere across the galaxy. It's no wonder this oral sex addicted girlfriend doesn't have any problem giving it up for her boyfriend's arch nemesis as well.

* Droxina / Planet Dildonia - Hidden in a forest of dildos, behind a guard and locked gate, sits the most prized conquest, Droxina, daughter of your arch nemesis, Dr. Dildo. If you're able to find the key to her chastity belt, you can help this angry girl get back at her daddy.

Final Thoughts:

Sex Olympics is short in humor, explicit in content, and the main character Brad lacks any personality or humanity. Like most x-rated entertainment, the lose plot is merely an excuse for sexual conquests, and the gameplay is at the level that children's adventure games were using at the time (minus the sex, nudity, and masturbation button), sometimes even recycling scenes, locations and gameplay from previous games in the series.

While the game does hold a oddball charm, and is worth a look as a weird oddity and an attempt at making an adults only computer during home computing's formative years, Brad, doesn't hold a floppy when compared to Larry Laffer's adventures.

---

From lemonamiga.com:

Brad Stallion 4: Sex Olympics

The goal in this graphic adventure is to score with more women than Dr.
Dildo does before the time runs out in the Sex Olympics. Objects needed to
accomplish various tasks are found at many locations on twelve planets and
inside the ship Big Thruster. There are some objects that are placed in
random locations from game to game and the maps of and paths to be taken
for some of the planets vary from game to game, so a definitive solve for
Sex Olympics is not possible. Instead of offering a linear solution, I will
detail what can be done on each planet, and you will have to decide in what
order you want to move from planet to planet. There are two sets of actions
for each planet--scoring with a woman and preventing Dr. Dildo from scoring
with a woman, so for each planet I will offer the means to both.

The randomly placed objects are the thermo schlong warmer (T.S.W.), the
weapon (C.D.G.), the Federation-issued Stun Gun, the Joe Smith I.D., the
C-size battery, the 6 volt battery, the 9 volt batter, the pair of glasses,
the key and the skeleton key. These objects may appear in any location on
any planet or in the Big Thruster. The two keys are dropped by Dr. Dildo
during his travels.

Look for and take objects in every location. Look for keys in locations
Dr. Dildo has visited (this can be checked by reading the galactic
bulletins, using the radar and looking at the ship's log), which may require
you to revisit some locations.

You will have to refuel on earth occasionally by going there and using
the tank.

At many locations you can get clues by talking to Sandie, your ship's
computer. At many locations hints are given about the location of
objects and successful strategies.

For some variety, try Look, Touch, Kiss, Eat face, breasts, loins before
and after sex with the females.

I. Map of Planets from Interactive View Screen of Big Thruster

Agua | Whisper | Primordial
Floe | Ramewe
Hivernia | Cleft | Beach
Arboria | Earth | Dildonia | Mediol

Unzip | Ship's Log | Interactive View Screen | Radar | Fuel Gauge

[...]

Planet Whisper

2 Areas (Outside Big Thruster | Galactic Library)

Agnus

Go Whisper. Unzip.
Go door. Give Brad Stallion I.D.
Use glasses. Drop clothes. Take clothes. Kiss.
Touch Agnus's face. Screw Agnus. Talk to Agnus.
Look book. Use clothes. S. Go Big Thruster.

Dr. Dildo--Before or after sex, do not take I.D. back.

---

From gamefaqs.com:

WHISPER (gray diamond, upper middle):

Need ID and glasses to complete, Closed sign suggested. DROP Closed sign (on grass in front of library) to stop DD from being able to enter, if he hasn't done Agnus already. GO door, GIVE ID card (the Brad Stallion one, not the Joe Smith!). TAKE ID back, USE glasses, KISS girl, DROP clothes, TAKE clothes, SCREW girl, USE clothes. TALK girl for a hint about Droxina. LOOK open book for a hint. BACK, GO ship. This is the only one that you can prevent DD from getting before you have the items necessary for you to do her yourself! The Closed sign will stop DD, but it doesn't stop you.

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